I mentioned in my first post that I am a part-time SAT tutor. Well, I WAS a part-time SAT tutor. As of this evening I am a former part-time SAT tutor. A little over a year ago, I was laid off from my full-time job as an executive assistant, and while J and I decided that staying home with A would be my new full-time job, I knew I needed a little bit more stimulation on the side. So I searched Craigslist for something I could do a few hours a week that would offer me a chance to use my brain for more than PBJ sandwiches and laundry, and might net me a little pocket money. I found an ad for a local tutoring center that was looking for people with college degrees and high SAT scores to do one-on-one SAT tutoring. I sent an email, and moments later I received a response asking me to come in and take a practice SAT to see if I qualified. Two days later I had my first student.
I am not by training a teacher. When I was in college (and in fact until I took this tutoring job), I had NO IDEA what I wanted to be when I grew up. So I pursued the only thing that I knew I would enjoy studying for four years: History. Then I graduated and discovered that people with a B.A. in History make excellent executive assistants, but without a post-graduate degree or a teaching certification, can't expect to do much in the history field. I toyed with the idea of going back for my Master's or getting a teaching cert., but I honestly didn't know what I'd do with a Master's, and I wasn't sure I'd enjoy teaching. I tend to like kids on a case-by-case basis, and I wasn't sure whether I could like them enough to be surrounded by them for 8 hours a day. Then I started tutoring, and I knew I'd found my calling. I LOVED IT.
So for the past year, I've been spending between 2 and 6 hours a week doing something I really enjoy: teaching. I made the decision to go back to school next year and get my teaching certification combined with my Master's, and in the meantime I was loving the little taste I was getting of my future career. Then the Education Director at the center quit. She was an amazingly organized and capable administrator, as well as being a great teacher, so it's no wonder that she was stolen away to teach 3rd grade in Virginia, but losing her was a disaster for the center. Instead of replacing her, the Center Director, L, decided that she and her assistant director would take over her duties on top of their own. Suddenly, schedules were late, messed up, or non-existent, teachers were matched with students who needed tutoring in subjects they didn't teach, and vaguely hostile emails started flying around about things like not wearing sandals to work and using breath mints. My easy and rewarding little side project stopped being about going in and spending a few hours teaching and more about trying to decipher new schedule rules, figuring out if I was scheduled at all, and fumbling through a session with a student who needed Biology help (did I mention that I was a History major? I should probably also mention that I barely eeked out a B- in Biology). As we headed into month 3 of this confusing administrative mess, with no end in sight, I started to consider whether what I was putting up with from management was worth it for the couple of hours a week that I actually enjoyed my work. But I did still enjoy it on those rare occasions when I was matched with a student I could actually help, so I was putting off making a decision.
And then this afternoon a new email arrived. It was more than vaguely hostile in tone, and the gist was that the teachers were responsible for the bulk of the scheduling issues, and more new scheduling rules were going into effect. I found this pretty ridiculous, especially since we hadn't actually gotten a schedule in 2 weeks and were getting our assigned hours by email the night before we were to work. How was this the fault of the teachers? We turned in our availability as required, using the document required, by the deadline required, yet they couldn't seem to get a weekly schedule together, and this was our fault? That made my decision for me. The people who teach at the center are dedicated, hard-working individuals who have made concession after concession in the wake of these administrative changes, and now they were being blamed for the problems. The center was no longer a place that I wanted to work. So I quit.
I was scheduled to work tonight from 6 to 8pm, and I arrived 15 minutes early so I could tender my resignation. I let the assistant center director know that this would be my last session, and thanked her for all of her help. A few minutes later, I saw that one of the center owners was at the front desk, so I wanted to thank her as well for the opportunity to work there. I went over to her, explained that this would be my last shift, and thanked her. She then asked me why I was leaving. I tried to gloss over my main complaints and said simply that the scheduling issues were too much for me with a 2 year old to find a babysitter for, and I just felt that it wasn't worth it for me right now. She said she understood, and then asked if there was anything in particular that was bothering me. And then I made a decision (probably a bad decision, but oh well). Most of the other tutors at the center are out of work teachers or others who need their job, so no one else was going to speak up about the accusatory email. The emails and other tensions were going to continue, and no one was going to be able to voice their complaints without risking their job. I had just quit. What were they going to do, fire me? So I dove in and told the owner about that day's email, and that I found it to be unfair to the teachers and very hostile in tone. The owner said she hadn't seen the email, but that I should understand that L is under a lot of pressure, and probably didn't mean the email to be taken badly. I agreed, but said that it was just the last straw for me, although I had really enjoyed working there nonetheless. The owner thanked me, and said that she hoped that when the administrative stuff got worked out that I would consider coming back.
I thought that was the end of it. My students arrived (another side effect of the regime change: sticking one tutor with 2 or 3 students because they'd neglected to schedule enough tutors), and I started working with them. Then 10 minutes later, L walked by and demanded to see me in her office immediately. I wondered, a little naively I admit, if after speaking to the owner she realized how her email was perceived and wanted to clear things up. I was wrong. She told me that there was nothing wrong with her email, that she'd made plenty of concessions for me in the past (A was sick and I had to call out a few times. It happens.) and I was incredibly ungrateful. I was also unprofessional for bringing up the email with the owner instead of coming directly to L. If I wanted to quit, then I could get my stuff and leave. Oh, and once again, I'm unprofessional. This was all said in a loud, carrying voice, with the office door open and parents outside waiting to see L. When she was finished her tirade about my unprofessionalism, she stared at me challengingly, as though daring me to object. I simply said, "Ok." I turned and walked back to my students, gathered my belongings, thanked the owner once again, and left.
Here's what I know I did wrong: I was honest. I was asked a question, and I decided to tell the truth, even though I knew it could be taken badly. I could have stuck with the "scheduling issues" line, and gotten out clean, able to finish my last shift without becoming a topic of gossip. And if they ever did get the administrative issues ironed out, I could have gone back and started working with students again, stigma free. I mean, who knows if my honesty made any difference for the other teachers? Clearly it made no difference to L; she sees nothing wrong with treating the teachers as one more annoyance in a long list. But I hope it at least opened the owner's eyes, even a tiny crack, to the fact that the atmosphere has become toxic and there are teachers willing to jump ship over it. I don't regret what I did. It ends here for me; I quit, I explained why, and I left with dignity. L demonstrated to a crowd of paying parents, and through the gossip mill 43 other tutors, that she would rather berate her teachers and tell them to leave than work through any issues. There were no winners here, but I sure don't feel like a loser. ;)
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